Alright, I've got a couple of hours before our christmas party, I should be studying philosophy but ummm no not yet please please don't make me i don't wanna mommy....sigh.

I realized tonight that reading other people's journals is like tuning into a soap opera. some of them draw me back time and time again because of the sheer fucked-upness of the authors. they're like train wrecks; i try to tear myself away but i just can't. others, like flanny's, are cool because the people who write them are my friends, and it's like having a sort of inside peek at what's happening in their lives without them having to spell everything out to everyone. then there are the ones that aren't fucked up, really, written by people i don't really know, but enjoyable all the same. an example of this would be greg's friend conor. i don't actually know him, really; i think i've met him a grand total of twice though he lives in my town and was close friends with greg. i have no idea what this kid's life is like, or what he's like, or who any of those bands he's usually talking about are, but i still click on his link from heather's site every so often and see what he's said. sometimes i read steven's site too, and stacy's, just for the hell of it, and i don't even really have mental images of those people! you never know, though: sometimes the randomest line from a stranger's journal touches me.

among all my christmas wishes for myself, i would include so many for other people. i hope that Sara gets rid of that nasty claire and finds joy in her surroundings. I hope that darts, rae and digiov find the strength to deal with their respectively troubled families, and that aj's knee gets better soon. i hope that heather finds whatever it is she's searching for, or maybe that she finds that she doesn't need to look anymore. i hope that meghan and i stay close, i hope greg finds enough sense to put himself on the path to freedom, that my sister gets into whatever school she wants and doesn't move back in my mom, and that my pets just for once learn to get along. i hope that people who are always down on the world realize that it's not so bad, and to look beyond the trite hallmark-tainted flavor of the holidays to what lies at the center: those you love and those who love you. i would wish for world peace if i didn't know that is, regrettably, forever out of our grasp; however, i will wish for a world-wide feeling of Hope. no matter what happens to you or around you, there is always hope.